THINKING.......

I am sitting here thinking as I do to myself of course as my son is asleep and I sure wouldnt want to confuse him with this issue....but I just do not understand how a grown man can deny his own child.

Yes like I agree, there are Deadbeat parents...Mothers and Fathers...who just abandon their precious children. Granted MY EX ASS has never physically seen our son! He is too much of a cheapskate ass to FLY over from England to come visit. He has never wanted to form ANY type of relationship with him.....just torment the hell out of me and I am SO fed up with his bullshit its not funny at all.

I see my husband in my son, as well as myself. He is a beautiful little boy.. I get teary eyed now as I sit here typing this out.....OK, so he has never paid child support ordered a year ago.....I dont care so much about the money the court ordered...its the fact that before I got pregnant... my EX ASS used to always speak about wanting a child....he would love to have this family......and because it took me quite some time to get preggo... hello I was 42 when I got preggo.. not 18 and ready to go.....he feels I cheated on him! I just wanted the man to form a relationship with our son, despite the distance.. but he is too cheap to do that much! JERK!

Let me explain my situation in England. He never worked.. he did not want to get a work permit here in the states.. so we go to England.. living with his Mum in a one bedroom council flat.....he claimed he wanted to get a car the first week there, so we did.. with MY money that I brought over... which by the way supported us for quite some time.....and he never got a job.. after I helped HIM get the car HE needed to go LOOK for this said job he claimed he could get with NO trouble!

So guess what the sorry git goes out and does, while I am at the flat sitting there with his elderly mother.. which by the way I loved his mother despite what he may think, bless her she had dementia.. and it was like being with a child at times.. even she had tantrums like the EX so I know he gets some of that from her.. but dementia really does not help in the situation and she could not help herself as much as she was independant....she was set in her ways.

SO the SOB goes out one morning.... claiming he is going to look for work.. and mind you.. jobs are there.. they have the JSA for gods sake.. they pay your ass to LOOK for a job!!!!! HE could get JSA ( Job Seekers Allowance ) and he got like 65 pounds a week.. thats over 100 bucks a week here in the US!! JUST TO LOOK FOR A JOB!!

AND his lame ass comes back.. after 6 hours.. Im thinking.. WOW.. they must have sent him to quite a few places to go to.....NOPE!! Not for my GIT of a husband.... he went to POOLE SHOPPING CENTRE and bought himself a freaking GAME CUBE and some games!! JESUS! I had given him the money to hold onto.. what a fool!!

He comes in like a child on christmas morning.... "Mum, I gotta check this out.. to see how it works! I need the TV"! I said," Umm how did the job searching go Git?" ( From now on I think I shall call him GIT ..means a foolish or worthless person! Imagine that.. the name fits him! )

The GIT says," I went to a few places, some are not hiring and one is to ring me back". Me being naive then....says.." Oh.. but GIT we do not need a freaking Game Cube!" His answer was" I plan on selling it.. I want to make sure it works". I said," Its NEW so I would think it would!" He then explains it is new and he can sell it and with a few games with it.. make a profit!

Well.. stupid me! This was the beginning of a LONG situation with the GIT! He was an obsessive compulsive shopper. Ok.. I am a woman.. hear me roar.. I LIKE to shop.. but do not feel the need to go to the MALL every single day for the damn week! The EX GIT did this.. if not the shopping centre... the strip malls.. the Toys R US... ASDA-WALMART....TKMAXX.. he HAD to buy something all the damn time.

In a year of marriage.. guess what I got from him..... a pair of $30 jeans from Bluewater mall in London, a belt that was $10...a british flag pin for my purse along the embankment the day before leaving the UK that was $4.00 and a keychain from Gatwick the day we left that was $5.00!!! THATS IT!!

My GOD I married a woman trapped in a skinny ass mans body!!